The Art of First Date Conversation
You’ve done it. You’ve finally gotten that first date with someone you find really attractive. Naturally, you want the date to go flawlessly. After all, the first date is where both parties get to know each other and determine if they are compatible, which could lead to a glorious second date and more. But, how do get through your first date with finesse? Well, you learn the fine art of first date conversation.
First of all, if you’re the one choosing the venue for the date, don’t choose one that will prohibit conversation. For example, a movie is generally not a good first date because you won’t be able to talk to each other while you’re in the theater, and that can be a very awkward situation for people who don’t know each other very well yet. Instead, get to know each other over coffee or dinner. This will give you ample opportunity to chat.
When it comes to chatting, stick to safe subjects. That may sound limiting, but it’s really not. It’s more about knowing what topics to stay away from than it is about knowing which ones to discuss. In general, politics, past romances, and physical attributes do not make good first date material. You also don’t want to be spilling your guts about how depressed you’ve been or your recent illness. A first date is not the time to get heavy, so keep the conversation upbeat.
Don’t worry; there are still plenty of things that you can talk about, such as your education, hobbies, pets, and sports interests. However, discussing your achievements could make you sound like you’re bragging, so it’s best not to bring them up unless they are relevant to the conversation you’re having.
As important as the first date conversation itself, the frequency with which you participate and listen is also key. Do not do all the talking. That will only make you seem like a person who values your interests above those of others. Talking too little, on the other hand, will make you come off as someone with very little confidence. It will also make you uninteresting. Strive for a healthy give-and-take conversation to keep the conversation friendly and flowing.
Remember, the other party is probably as anxious as you are to make a good impression, so try to relax. This mood is infectious, and your date will be relaxed if you are. Once you decide that you like each other, you can move on to that second date. It will get easier each time. After just a few dates, you’ll be conversing comfortably without giving it a second thought.
As you can see, the first date can go really well or it can be terribly awkward; it’s really up to you. First date conversation is indeed an art form, but it’s one you should have no trouble mastering. Avoid prolonged lapses in conversation and topics that can hinder the experience, and you can’t go wrong. Once you develop these simple skills, you’ll find that first dates become something you look forward to instead of hurdles you just want to get past.